“Their Singapore Rice Noodles Are To Die For”

Red Bowl Asian Bistro

3538 Mt Holly-Huntersville Road

Charlotte, NC 28217

Tel: 704-391-7181

Good Lord, where do I start? Well, this might be the shortest review ever. Well, first of all to start, this got to have Panda Express beat when it comes to good ass food. Now, before you start giving me negative contacts about Panda Express, I will still patronise Panda Express; because Panda Express is strictly Chinese, whereas The Red Bowl Asian Bistro is a fusion cuisine mixing up food from various areas of Asia. They have food from Singapore, Malaysia, Thailand, China, Vietnam and Malaysia. But for this, I am gonna focus on this delicious Singaporean cuisine. Let’s first tell you what Singapore is. Singapore is a country in Southeast Asia, and it is bordered between Malaysia and Indonesia (by water). Four main languages are spoken in Singapore, and that is more-or-less important. They speak English, Malay (Malaysia), Chinese and Tamil. I tell you, if they thought lightly of LGBTs in Singapore, I would love to go to Singapore and be like the people on Globe Trekker or The Travel Channel. PBS is good only for their British Comedies and for Globe Trekker. Damn Time Warner Cable for changing The Travel Channel to Nick Jr. Singaporean cuisine is fusion of Malaysian, Chinese and Indian food. I checked on Wikipedia, and I found out that Singapore rice noodles are not popular in Singapore. So is China being an imposter? If so, why is such a tasty delicacy not called Chinese Rice Noodles? Anyway, when it comes to the Red Bowl, their Singapore rice noodles are to die for.

Before I get to what Singapore rice noodles are, I wanna tell you how to get there. Now, they have 3 locations. One on Providence Road, One on Mt Holly-Huntersville Road and one in Tega Cay. If you wanna go to the one that I patronise the most, by car, from Uptown Charlotte, take the Brookshire Freeway all the way to the end of the line. It will turn into Brookshire Blvd. You will pass I-85 and I-485. Turn left at the first left after passing I-485. That is Mt Holly-Huntersville Road. It is in the same shopping centre as Wendy’s, Rite Aide, Harris Teeter, and a nail bar. You can catch either the 1 or the 88X bus to get there. I have never been to the one on Providence Road, nor the one in Tega Cay, duh. I am on probation, and I can’t even think about stepping on South Carolina soil. Now, let’s get to what Singapore rice noodles are. They are small noodles, skinnier than spaghetti and skinnier than angel hair pasta. Think about it as a microcosm of Ramen noodles. It has curry in it, and some vegetables. Now, if you ask for it, you can either omit the chicken, shrimp or have it bareback. I am allergic to shrimp, but hell, Singapore rice noodles aren’t to die for without both chicken and shrimp. My ulterior motive is to get it during the midday, where it is cooked to order and comes with an egg roll. The waiter might already know our name, because we get the same thing all the time. We get two Singapore rice noodles: One all the way, one without shrimp; Pad Thai with sriracha hot sauce; crispy wontons and hot and sour soup. Sometimes we get extra sriracha sauce and Vietnamese shrimp rolls. I don’t eat Pad Thai, sriracha sauce nor Vietnamese shrimp rolls.

I rate this restaurant on a 10 point scale, where 1 is horrid and 10 is excellent, a 10 for food, 10 for temperature, 8 for accessibility and 10 for courteous staff. You can best believe this is gonna be my celebratory nosh, and to add on to it, I am gonna go to Wal-Mart and get some of their fried chicken wings. Yeah, I know I’m fat; don’t knock me for it.

 

McChicken v Original Chicken Sandwich

The McChicken sandwich is from McDonald’s and the Original Chicken Sandwich is from Burger King. There are two differences that makes them both different.

• PRICE: The McChicken Sandwich is on McDonald’s Dollar Menu and will come out to be $1.08 when it comes down to it. The Original Chicken Sandwich is on Burger King’s Value Menu as either a combo meal or a la carte. If you buy a la carte, you can look at about $2.75 without tax. But here is something that got McDonald’s beat. If you look on the back of your receipt, there is a number you can call and do a short survey and get a subsidy for the cost of the Original Chicken Sandwich for the next visit.  The survey is about 5 minutes, but it is worth it.
• TASTE: The taste of the McDonald’s McChicken tastes like the team members caked the patty in Mrs Dash.  And the Original Chicken Sandwich from Burger King tasted actually quite bland if you only get mayonnaise. I usually get dijonnaise for the sandwich which makes it taste a little bit better.

If you have a tight budget, McDonald’s McChicken sandwich (or biscuit) is your best route.  For a price range of $1 in most areas of America, it is a great value. If you are looking for a sandwich that will fill you up, the Original Chicken Sandwich is your route for you. Though there is a possibility that the restaurant that you may go to may not have Dijonnaise sauce, just remember, not all restaurants make their sandwiches the same. 

Cigarette Reviews: Kool 100s

I feel as if I am doing you all a service at this, because myself smoking just about any cigarette (except Marlboro and Winston) that is menthol makes you have a better choice in smoking pleasure.

PRICE: The price is quite the same of a pack of Newport cigarettes, but it might be a little bit less (like a dime or two less. If you get them in Charlotte, do not buy them from any convenience store in Uptown. You will overpay in upwards of $.50 to almost $2. I went to the Woodies at the corner of South Blvd and Sharon Road West and Kools cost $5.63 with tax. Whereas if you buy them on my side of town, you will only pay $4.60 for a pack. Even Rite-Aide is not cost-wise.

TASTE: According to a 1960s commercial, I thought Kool was caked in menthol. It was not, and there is a debunking that needs to be done. You still get the taste of tobacco and menthol, however the menthol doesn’t overpower the tobacco.

LOOK: It looks just like any filtered cigarette, with a little room in the end of the cigarette, and a brown filter on top of the cigarette. Like Newport, they have their brand name encrusted into the cigarette, whereas a Pall Mall, it has it at the filter line. Like a Pall Mall, it also does have a filter line; but I like to smoke past that point, and give my lip a little tingle.

OVERALL: Their main purpose is for those who are sophisticated Uptown guys who drives a nice car, and has a trophy wife by his side as his moll. If I had to pick between Newport and Kool, I would take turns (Newport, Pall Mall, Kool, Camel) in buying cigarettes.

Cigarette Reviews: Pall Mall Menthol 100s

Let me first tell you I bought Pall Mall Menthol 100s because, while I was in gaol, one of the inmates told me about how Pall Mall has little difference to Newport. I smoke only Newport and Camel, so I said “why not? I have already smoked Marlboro Red 100s.”

PRICE: Pricewise, it is usually cheaper to buy them in the suburban neighbourhoods of large cities. When I bought them, the till came out to $4.32. $.78 cheaper than Newport. At Woodies on North Tryon in Charlotte, they cost about $3.75, so about the same price. But if you get it in Overstreet Mall, you might be looking at damn near $6.

TASTE: I thought that Pall Mall was a Crackhead cigarette, because the people who I know smoked Pall Mall says that it smells like Clorox and Fabuloso. I was astounded how it tasted. It did not smell like Clorox and Fabuloso blend. It actually actuated a damn Newport cigarette.

LOOK: The look of a Pall Mall looks just like any filtered cigarette, with a little room in the end of the cigarette, and a brown filter on top of the cigarette. Unlike Newport, they have their paper encrusted on a separate sheet of paper that acts as a dividing line. I like to smoke past that line. It gives my lip a nice tingle and heats up a cold middle and index finger.

OVERALL: Sophistication, Cheaper, and Tasteful. It would be horrid if I had to pick between a Newport or a Pall Mall. I might end up picking whichever I feel is better, spending $4.32 or $5.10? It has less menthol than Kool, and is less harsh than Newport. If I could refer my neighbours and fellow smokers to Pall Mall, I’d say yes. However, not a lot of stores outside of the central business district (on the westside) sell Pall Mall.

What Happened to The Chronicles of Yung $hawty?

Nothing happened, just until this entire thing with me and CATS and the US Marshals get back to normal, that blog will be down, but I will be putting it back in in 90 days. I am not about to lose my hard earned blog for CATS’ pussiness.

Anyways, I was given a memorandum talking about a blog entry I had on the Chronicles. These heifers at CATS banned me, and now I have someone on my YouTube page talking about me. How much I wanna look for him and go and cuss his ass out, I can’t. The judge gave me 2 years probation. I am not about to spend 2 years in prison for cussing someone out.

I Murdered That Crab and Lobster Bisque

Newk’s Express Cafe

100 North Tryon St

Charlotte, NC 28202

Today, I went to get something to eat because Reverend Furtick had looked out for a couple of us. Elevation Church is a very boring church, but if that means more crab and lobster bisque, Eucharistic sacrament will have to wait. That was a good deal, Reverend Furtick, and you can see me at the City of Charlotte: A Big City Clean and the Crisis Assistance Ministry for community service. Just in case I have to do community service, I would mark it down without a date on it.

Anyways, I was with a couple of my guyfriends, and they both did their public service today. My head was hurting and I was to rendezvous with one of my big dicked niggas who wanted to try and turn me out. He reneged on it or either forgot… Thank God he did, I woke up with a debilitating charley-horse and it would make it worse to try and have sex. And to answer your question, IT WILL FAIL ON HIM. I WILL ALWAYS BE A TOP.

So, when I looked at the thing, which was a business card length and red in colour, and had Elevation Church… and Newk’s Express Cafe’s monikers. I squealed a little in my head.  I knew what I was gonna get. One of my guyfriends got some shrimp pizza and I got a Newk’s Q sandwich (which was barbecue sauce, grilled chicken, Swiss cheese, Applewood smoked bacon and melted to perfection) and crab and lobster bisque.  When I got home, I felt an honour to eat that. Just like everything, I would ask someone to do a taste test of anything I got before I ate anything.  My mum  liked both the sandwich and the bisque. My sister liked it as well. So what? My mum and my sister might have a different taste palate than I do.

Let me tell you, I murdered that crab and lobster bisque. That is a succulent soup, and I would eat it everytime I got sick. I would run out the house assnaked, dick dangling round and round just to get strep and eat some more of that crab and lobster bisque. Then I forgot… Today is supposed to be 81 degrees Fahrenheit or 27 degrees Celsius. Tomorrow is supposed to be 82 degrees Fahrenheit or 28 degrees Celsius.

“Hardees is not a venue for family pow-wows, or begging, it’s a place of business”

Hardees

4501 E WT Harris Blvd

Charlotte, NC 28215

 

On Saturday, I walked to the Hardees at the corner of WT Harris Blvd and The Plaza, because I was in no mood to go into town to Burger King. Before hand, I went to the Circle K and got me one of those soda pop deals.  The deal was “Buy a 20oz soda pop, and get a 2 litre soda pop free, any flavour diet or regular of 7-Up, A&W, Canada Dry, Sunkist” . The expiry date is right up my avenue as well! It expires on December 31st 2009. Anyway, I felt as if, their hamburgers were not gonna fill me up anyway, I went and I bought 2 “small hamburgers”. Small hamburgers they was. And they were cheaper than Burger King, and tasted a little better. The  inside was looking alright, the last time I went into Hardees, they did not have big screen TVs, and they didn’t have nice looking wallpaper either. Oh well, we can’t hate on progress. The only issue, is that, the person who took my order, was like all other black men. They don’t want a faggot in their line, polluting his air.

I ate inside, and then after I finished eating, I made the journey back to my house. I went outside, and these 2 black men, who was supposed to be doing their job asking this girl to wash her car for $3. They were also dapping up some people, like this is a barbershop in the city. Child. Anyway you put it, I’d come back, because Hardees is somewhat cheaper and fills me up.

 

Scale

• Taste of food- 88/B
• Cleanliness of Restaurant- 96/A
• Kindness of Staff- 76/C
• Freshness of Food- 81/B
• Fastness of Food- 66/D

Even though, this restaurant gets a passing grade, this may not be LGBT friendly restaurant. I’m a bisexual, and the man who took my order looked as if he was disgusted at how I am.